I hate waiting. I know that I am in a time of change right now, of moving forward, of progress. But today feels like a day of waiting. Part of me is waiting for the answer to come falling from the sky. Part of me is just…waiting.
I am oddly proud of myself in this moment though. Proud because I am aware that I am not in control. I am aware that sometimes things take time and patience…two things that I’m not good at dealing with.
And truthfully, how good are you at dealing with it if you’re antsy…if you’re thinking about it constantly, if you’re planning for what if’s. Strike the proud. Yes, I’m aware of the lack of control, but I don’t like it.
I think that today I just need to go to bed. Nothing’s coming out right. I can’t express myself properly. I can’t even communicate it in writing. I don’t have the patience.
I so feel you on this. Waiting is the worst. Especially when you don’t know what the outcome will be.